One thing I’ve learned in my years of high level coaching is this: it’s rarely knowing what to do that hinders someone’s progress. No, what actually hinders progress is actually doing the damn thing.
Pulling the trigger… taking the first step… embracing the (momentary) suck of taking the action required to move forward.
Seems like a no-brainer, yeah? And from an intellectual standpoint, it is.
Ahh, but then the real world comes rushing in. And all those real-world fears. And that unsettling lack of safety, coupled with an unconscious, overwhelming desire for sameness.
Even if that “sameness” is a shitty situation. And that’s enough to prevent any action being taken in the world. So people will wallow for years in whatever shitty relationship, job, or (fill in the blank) situation.
Essentially, same = safe to our “primitive”, unconscious minds. So our conscious minds create all manner of distraction techniques to keep us from actually doing the damn thing to get us out of said situation. Much safer to stay in the head and ruminate on all the “buts”, “what ifs” and “I don’t know whys”.
At its core, Buddhism, like (true) astrology, is a study of human psychology. As such, it long ago identified five basic obstacles that hinder one's spiritual progress. And the same obstacles apply to the more earthly and mundane spheres as well. These obstacles are known as the Five Hindrances (pañca nīvaraṇāni). These are:
1. Sensory desire (kāmacchanda): This refers to craving for pleasurable experiences through the five senses. It’s all the distractions we seek to avoid doing the thing. Anything from drinking to porn to endlessly scrolling cat videos. Bread and circuses, as it were.
2. Ill-will (vyāpāda): This includes feelings of hostility, resentment, hatred, and bitterness. It's likened to being sick, as ill-will can cause inner pain and destruction. This can be directed at self or other. And if you’re a coach, this “ill-will” can certainly be directed at you.
3. Sloth-and-torpor (thīna-middha): This refers to mental dullness, laziness, and lack of effort or concentration. It's compared to being imprisoned, unable to participate in life fully. Any excuse NOT to move forward. I’ve even had clients “doze off” right when on the precipice of a major breakthrough.
4. Restlessness-and-worry (uddhacca-kukkucca): This is the inability to calm the mind and focus one's energy. It's likened to being a slave, constantly forced to act without rest or autonomy. This is the favorite choice of the entrepreneurial world. Digging holes just to fill them back in. Jam-packed schedules from sunrise to sunset… and beyond.
5. Doubt (vicikiccha): This refers to a lack of conviction or trust in one's abilities or in the practice itself. It's compared to being lost in a desert, unsure of which direction to take. Take the “unsure of what step to take” out of the equation, and it’s replaced by a multitude of other doubts and excuses.
Like I said, these hindrances are considered obstacles not only to meditation and spiritual ascension, but also to wisdom and insight in daily life. Or simply exiting a shitty situation.
So what kind of push is required to get someone to take the first action step? Unfortunately for most, the pain of being stuck in the status quo has to eventually outweigh the pain of taking that first step into the unknown.
Better yet, we can understand, and come to grips with, the Five Hindrances. And acknowledge that they operate within every one of us. At that point we can choose (everything is a choice) to see the hindrance for what it is, acknowledge it, and move through it.
Or
We can choose to indulge the hindrance; wallow, ruminate and stall in our progress.
In the end, everything is a choice. Plata ‘O Plomo, as the cartel used to say. The silver or the lead.
Til next time,
Keith
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